New Years Boundaries
Every year, I make New Years resolutions. Each year, I sit down and daydream about how much better I will be in the coming year. All the things I will do better, all the things I will accomplish. Because if I do better and do more, then I will BE better and BE more. Right?
Wrong, obviously, but still, every year I have tried it. And every year, it seems that by February 1st, most of my resolutions are already out the window and I'm left beating myself up for failing yet again.
So this year, I'm doing something different. This year, instead of thinking how I could DO MORE in the coming year, I thought about how I could BE HAPPIER instead. This year, instead of setting resolutions, I'm setting boundaries.
I started by identifying some of the biggest sources of stress or unhappiness in my life (feeling like I don't give enough undivided attention to my daughter, feeling like I'm always working and never getting enough done, etc.), and then I thought about what boundaries I could set to help improve those aspects of my life. Here are a few of the boundaries I came up with:
- On the same day each week, spend the whole day with family. No computer, no facebook.
- No screens allowed during meals.
- Set aside specific works hours each week. Let go of work at other times.
In addition to being a human who needs some amount of work/life balance, I'm also a dedicated and compassionate doula who cares deeply about my clients. Setting boundaries isn't an option for me if it means my clients will suffer. This is why I so value and believe in the way we operate at Doulas of Des Moines.
I am so grateful I stumbled upon a business partner who has the same high standards for doula support that I do. Together, we built our agency to be sustainable and supportive of both the clients AND the doulas we serve. We have a built-in network of support for our clients and our doulas within our agency. With multiple Postpartum & Infant Care Doulas, we can work with our clients' schedules without running ourselves or our doulas ragged. Our labor doulas work in teams so that our clients can be confident one of THEIR doulas - never a backup - will attend their birth, and they'll get a doula who isn't burnt out and exhausted from trying to do it all themself.
As doulas, we sacrifice a lot for our clients because we are passionate about what we do. We believe that new parents deserve non-judgmental, unbiased support, and we work incredibly hard to make sure they get it. We also recognize that we cannot be good support people if we don't care for ourselves too. The way we do business allows us to care for ourselves. The way we do business allows me to pursue a healthier and happier me in 2018.
We take care of ourselves and our team so that we can provide the best possible support to our clients. And I wouldn't have it any other way.